Well like almost every woman in America, when I heard the Supreme Court’s ruling on Roe I was overcome with several very aggressive emotions. Anger, outrage, disgust, fear, just to name a few. Like other women my age, I’ve had 50 years of being able to make the choices for my body and I’m pretty good at it. In fact, I’d say I’m the de facto go to decision maker when it comes to what I need for my own body. Not once have I said to my husband, hey do you think this yeast infection will just clear up or should I see my OBGYN? In fact, not once has ANY woman ever thought to herself, hey do you think my local politician will know if my heavy menstrual flow is the sign of a problem? So the next question bears to reason, why are politicians now the one’s making decisions about women’s bodies? Have they dealt with a yeast infection or undergone a hysterectomy, been told they’ll never have children because their uterus is too full of fibroids that they can conceive, but will always miscarry? NO THEY HAVE NOT. So again, why are they making the decisions about what I can and can’t do with my own body. I don’t want to decry the old swan song of “my body, my choice,“ but this really is the case. It IS my body. It IS my choice. I don’t see any laws that state men must get vasectomy’s. Heck, there’s not even a law in place that makes rape less attractive to a rapist, such as, if you rape a woman you get castrated. This seems pretty fair to me.
So let’s get to the point of this, why aren’t men held accountable for the pregnancies they cause. Pregnancy happens to a woman, but she’s not the CAUSE of it. It takes a man’s sperm to create an embryo, without that sperm you get nothing. Women can’t just spontaneously get pregnant. So no sperm, no baby. No woman to gestate it for 9 months, no baby. The burden of pregnancy is always on the woman, raising for/caring for/feeding/protecting/nurturing the child is on the woman, all other bodily changes and possible issues that pregnancy causes, including monetary burden is on the woman. Yes I will admit that a lot more men are stepping up in the child raising arena and want to applaud them for that, but the first 9 months is all on the woman.
Where do men fit into this? They should fit into this, but right now they don’t. Let’s consider this scenario. A couple find out their pregnant, the male side jumps ship at the news and is never heard from again. The woman is left pregnant, lives in a Red state and can’t get an abortion. The burden is all on her, but I think that should be changed and changed using the law. The man that caused the pregnancy should be held accountable for that child. So the law could say something to the effect of, if the woman chooses she can force the man to take control of the child after birth, force him to pay for 50% of the child’s welfare, force him to own up to his emissions result. Mark his credit, mark his records, put a marker on his life that this child is because of him and he should be held to account for it. Make the burden of the life he caused less of a burden on the woman and more on him. Men weasel out of responsibilities all the time, we see it on Maury every day. It’s time for that to stop.
Now don’t get me wrong, this is certainly not the only solution. But if a man knew that by law a child could get dumped on him permanently and he’d be legally bound to support that child and there’s nothing he could do to stop it, there could be a bit of a sway in his thinking about it. Yes, men have been avoiding child support or not paying it for decades you say, so this isn’t going to work you say. You’re not wrong, but if it were a real law then if a woman wanted, she could drop off the baby with her sperm donor and walk away, with no questions asked and no legal ramifications. How many Republican politicians would just love finding their mistresses baby on their doorstep and they can’t do a darn thing about it? Imagine the scandal.
I look forward to hearing your thoughts and suggestions.